Banana Bread

Ever since I was a child, my mom would make this  - the most excellent banana bread.  It has been passed down as a family favorite.

Last night, a cooler late-summer evening, I decided to make a loaf.  Two actually.  One with nuts another without.  Banana bread served with fresh fruit is one of everyone's favorite breakfasts.  I especially like it because it can be made ahead and leaves little clean up in the morning!
After the little guys had showered and Isaiah and I had cleaned up from dinner, they all helped me to prepare the batter.  I remember well my job as a child, to peel and mash the bananas.  For some reason little boys find that job particularly amusing.

Isaiah joined in the fun with his brothers, even though he was sure to inform me that he could have baked the bread himself.  He certainly could have, but he and I both enjoyed the time spent together mixing, mashing and laughing at Noah.  Poor Noah sounded as though someone had hit the repeat button..."I have some?   Peas {Please}!?  I have some?  Peas!?"

Of course, once the mixing is done every boy stands in line for what they call "a batter lick". 

The best part...

Mom's Banana Bread

1 3/4 c. flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. baking soda
1/3 c. shortening
2/3 c. granulated sugar
2 eggs
1 c. bananas {2-3 mashed}
walnuts {optional}

Mix flour, baking powder and baking soda.  Cream shortening with sugar and well beaten eggs.  Blend with dry ingredients and bananas.  Grease loaf pans.  Bake in glass loaf pans @ 325 degrees for about 50-60 minutes.

Raising Readers - Part III

What should children read?

While it is a common assumption that little boys will only enjoy reading twaddle such as Captain Underpants, this is far from the reality! 

It has been our experience that when children are provided with quality literature from the beginning and are not exposed to the twaddle, they will be drawn in by worthwhile content.  They will appreciate good writing.  Their minds will be stimulated, they will learn, grow and their worldview will be shaped - in part- by what they read. 

Paul states, in his letter to the Philippians the following:

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."  Philippians 4:8

If we are to think on such things, shouldn't the material we read reflect the same?   Should we not, as parents, put great effort into selecting the most God-honoring content for our children to read?

I know.  The argument is that if we don't let them read it they'll want to read it more!  I say, "not true"!  It's that simple.  When children understand why they should not read something, they are likely to join with you in searching for quality reading material.  The young adult market is inundated with paranormal fiction, dungeons and dragons, and even erotica!  Is it acceptable to allow them to read such material simply because it's what is readily available?

Practically, how does a parent monitor everything a child reads?  How do you provide constant appropriate reading material?  In a word- intention.  It takes, like most everything else, time, effort and consistency.  We do this in several ways.

Some books Dan prereads before we offer them to our boys.  (Dan is a far better and faster reader than myself).  This is fairly rare, however.  We live in an age with the world at our fingertips!  The internet is filled with Christian reviews of all sorts of books.  When necessary, we read all the reviews we can to help us in making a decision about a particular book.

We use booklists from trusted sources.  One such source is our homeschool curriculum, My Father's World, which provides a list of living books that coincide with each unit of study.  Another list is is from Ambleside Online, a free online homeschool curriculum.  We sometimes us the Sonlight book lists also.

A book we enjoy greatly is Honey for a Child's Heart by Gladys Hunt.  This book provides excellent recommendations, with the exception of one.  The newest version includes Harry Potter, regretfully.  We do not recommend the Harry Potter series for children, regardless of their reading ability.  This book is about the value of reading and is filled with book lists of all sorts.



Even with these resources, you may find that the recommended books are not easy to come by.  Again, technology proves not all bad.  Inter Library Loan (ILL) systems allow you to log into your library account online and reserve books from numerous libraries.  If that fails, a visit to the reference librarian should find you what you need as they can request books from all over the country!  After reading through the lists numerous times you begin to memorize them.  You can often find some of these great books at yard sales and library book sales.

In fact, just yesterday at our continuous library book sale, I found Rascal (PMC) (Puffin Modern Classics) - one of Isaiah's favorites.  We found The Year At Maple Hill Farm, Mustang: Wild Spirit of the West, Paddle-to-the-Sea (Sandpiper Books), The Easter Cat, and several others.  We paid only a dollar for the entire pile!

You may also note that most of the books of high quality are older works.  This is also true!  Look at the best seller lists and compare.  What is new and popular is NOT typically that which is Godly or God-honoring!

Admittedly, it does take great time and effort to find great quality reading material for kids and adults alike.  That said, it can be such a fun adventure to find good books, and great discussions can be had about what is appropriate reading material given God's standards, and what is not.

The other argument often heard is that it's best to let children read what they choose or what is given to them at school, even if these books contain inappropriate content, and then discuss with them what they read.  That sounds good, and is a great solution for those times when something slips by, but it assumes that the parent has full knowledge of the book to be able to discuss it thoroughly.  It also discounts Philippians 4:16 in that knowingly giving a child material that promotes sinfulness in some way is to greatly risk leading them to sin.   Daily life in our fallen world leaves plentiful opportunity to discuss the beliefs, views and ideas of others unlike ourselves.  We need not feed it to our children intentionally.

Consider this:

"...but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea."  Matthew 18:6 

Raising Readers - Part II

How to instill a love of reading...

It has been my experience that children learn to read when they're ready to learn to read.  My experience is taken from children I nannied for, my own children and many friends' children.  Teaching reading is quite simple and is not the rocket science the education world makes it to be.  Parents who can read themselves are more than qualified to teach their children to read.  Special degrees are not requirements!  Not every child needs to be, should be, or will be three or four years of age when learning to read.  Each finds their own motivation.  It is not difficult - it simply takes patience, time and encouragement on the part of the parent.

There are things we can do to prepare our children for reading from even the earliest days of life.
Here are a few.

•      Talk to your children.  Infants included!  This helps them learn language.  It helps their conversation skills, it helps them learn tone and inflection.  It begins to build relationship between you and the child, even before they can fully understand your words.  It helps them decipher sounds, and it reassures them of your presence.

•      Build a library.  Begin when your children are young to build a library for them.  Books can be found cheap or free at any yard sale or library book sale.  Do not keep 'twaddle' (a term coined by Charlotte Mason for books of little value).  Instead, keep books that are of great worth - there are many!

•      READ!  It's difficult, perhaps near impossible, to raise readers if you are not a reader yourself.  Set the example.  Let your children see you reading often.  Your love of books will rub off.

•       Read to your children daily!  This is extremely important.  This teaches that we read from left to right and how pages are turned.  It teaches tone and inflection in reading.  It aids conversation skills, language skills, vocabulary, pronounciation.  It fosters a love for reading, for books, for the time spent snuggling together, sharing the words on a page.

•      Don't stop reading to your children!  Children who read well on their own still enjoy being read to as they get older.  Don't think that because your child can read he no longer needs to be read to!

•      Encourage, encourage, encourage - but DON'T push!  Like potty training, if it's pushed on the child they will reject it.  Encourage their efforts and success.  Reward, cheer, make a big deal of the sounding out of those first words.  Remember to encourage the two year old who recognizes that a Dairy Queen sign in a new town, a place he has never visited, is synonymous with "I- Keem" (ice cream).  It's early decoding.  It might be the colors of the sign and the style of the building and all more than the words themselves, but it's the same principle!

•      Be patient.  Sit through the sometimes painful half-hour-long reading of those very first readers.  "See Jane Run" can seem to take an eternity for an early reader to spit out.  DO NOT tell them what it says assuming they can't figure it out, if they have the desire to try!  Use your finger to point to each letter as they blend the sounds.  Remind them of the sounds they've already deciphered "J- A-...... then wait for them to fill in the N as you point"  If they truly don't know, help them out but don't rush to their aid.

•      Use a simple phonics based approach.  Letters make sounds, sounds squish together to make other sounds.  Very simple.  Kids will learn sight words quickly.  In just weeks of daily patient listening over the shoulder of a beginning reader, kids will begin to very quickly recognize those sight words that are often used - the, a, an, on, of...  That's great!  Encourage that.  They still have the ability to sound out new words which will help them later on.

•      Forget the "rules" of reading.  To drill a child on reading rules (silent e, and long vowel vs. short for example) distracts from reading.  Much of reading is common sense.  'Bak-E' is not the word.  It's 'bake'. You can point out at times that the e is silent because it does it's job in making the 'A' a long 'A', if you want, but it's not necessary.  Children will learn the rules simply from experiencing them.

•      Forget about the alphabet!  Use flashcards to help teach letter sounds - not names!  Letter names are not important until later on.  The alphabet is useless in teaching a child to read.  A little one knowing the alphabet song is not a sign of reading readiness.

•      Play games.  I Spy is a great one!  "I spy with my little eye something that begins with "T-" (letter sound, not name!)  Another is to read road signs and store/restaurant/gas station signs when driving in the car.  I remember sitting at a stop light sounding out "Bertucci's" with Isaiah when he was very small.

Each child is different.  Each is driven to learn by different means.  Isaiah was driven by a desire to learn.  He loved birds and so desired to be able to read his field guide that that was what motivated him.  Elijah, always one to be up for a good competition, wanted to read what his brother was reading.  Elijah at age two would get up early in the morning and retreat to the sunroom.  He had miniature Precious Moments flash cards that we kept in a little plastic baggie.  He would drill himself for hours each morning: "U-u- Umbrella.  B-b butterfly".  Morning after morning, he would be at my bedside when I would wake, flashcards in hand, waiting for his daily drill.  It took a long time for him to get them all right - but he so badly wanted to read.  He needed to do it on his terms, and in his time.  Once he had the sounds all right, we moved on to early readers.

God gave us His Word in written form.  He gave us His Word - His living, inerrant, Word that will last forever.  If his Word is to be a sword, a light to our path, the Truth that sets us free, the Spirit that gives life, if it is to be a source of hope and encouragement, if we are to meditate on it day and night, if we are to obey and cherish His Word - should not we read it well and often?  Should we not require the same of our children?

* It bears stating that I do recognize that there are exceptions to the general rule.  There are disabilities that prevent or delay a child's natural ability to learn to read.  This post does not address those special circumstances.  *

Raising Readers - Part I

Why read?

Early on, Dan and I decided that it would be a priority for our children to learn to read, and read well. Our initial priority was simply because we wanted our children to read scripture.   God chose to inspire holy men to write His words, and to direct us - his people- to read, and follow it.

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God"  Matthew 4:4

"But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work."   

2 Timothy 3:14-16

When Isaiah was about 4, he began asking about how he could learn this or that.  Dan's response was

 "Learn to read.  If you learn to read, you can learn anything there is to learn."  

How true this has proven to be!  A whole new world opens when children learn to read.  Isaiah began to discover this a the age of four when he could read his field guide to himself and distinguish between the types of birds in the backyard.  Now, much of the boys' play is derived from what they read.  How much better to read and imagine what life was like on an island for the Swiss Family Robinson than to watch TV and have it all acted out for you?

Through living books, historical and fictional figures and characters like Daniel Boone, Leif Erickson, Aslan, and Peter Rabbit all come alive in the imagination of a child.  Creativity and productivity are fostered.  What delight and enjoyment they share through discussion, through play.  The friendship and relationship the brothers share is fostered in large part by words.  The words read from the pages of their favorite books that they share, and the words that have become part of their vocabulary that are used to converse and to communicate.

Children's comprehension, vocabulary, spelling, and conversation abilities can be drastically advanced simply through reading.  With that, the ability to read and understand scripture is fostered as well.  How spectacular to read a passage of scripture and be able to discuss it with your son who has read it on his own.  A different perspective often, through the eyes of a child, but sometimes the depth than can be grasped is astounding.

A book.  A simple pleasure.  Cheap, nearly always free.  It can be taken anywhere.  We see our boys often lost in a world of imagination in the backseat of the mini-van.  Silent chuckles, smiles, sometimes tears seen in the rearview mirror.  "It makes the time pass faster", they say.  "Here Squeaky!  Read this one next!"  "Mama, my favorite story is Elijah Restores the Widow's Son".
I have no greater joy....
I pray this is only the beginning...

Compassion

The last post in a series begun with Gratitude.

A story of a lesson in compassion taught to my children and I by two unknowing teachers, two dear friends in opposite stages of life.  One nearing the end of life, battling lung cancer in her mid-eighties, the other pregnant with her fourth child.
Neither one knew the impact they had on us last summer....

Our friend Laila whom we much admired and enjoyed, a wise and perceptive older woman full of spunk,  was nearing the end of life having been diagnosed with terminal cancer.  The boys and I had visited her often, though in hindsight not often enough.  We would enjoy picnics with her in her yard on summer afternoons, we would stop by now and then with treats and for short visits.  Dan would do the same often bringing coffee that they would enjoy together.
She was a joy to be with, always treating the children like little people, conversing with them as though they were bright and intelligent and capable of having an opinion of their own.  An approach most adults don't take with children.  She loved them and they her.  She had keen insight on goings on in the church.  She spoke kindly, yet with great honesty.

Our other dear friend Wendy was wanting to teach her own children to care for the elderly.  "How can I get to know her?" she would ask of Laila.  I told her, "just stop by with flowers - she loves them.  Let her know you are praying for her and care about her.  Be clear that you have no expectation of her, you just want to be her friend".  Before long, Laila was warming up to Wendy and her children.

Wendy was pregnant with her fourth child at the time.  Sick almost daily.  Homeschooling her three kids and packing for a big move to another state.  Regardless, Wendy found time to stop by numerous times each week to tend to Laila.  Each time she would bring something.  Things I had not thought to bring myself.  She understood what would be helpful to Laila.  She would bring a single serving of homemade soup,  other times she would bring a basket filled with a little of this and a little of that from the grocery store.
She would bring flowers...
She understood that the visits needn't be lengthy to be meaningful.

One morning, Wendy called.  "I just saw Laila and brought her lunch.  I told her you would be bringing her dessert tonight.  Make sure you go.  She's excited for her brownies and ice cream and there's not much time left".

We made brownies as we had planned.  After dinner, I brought my oldest son with me.  We brought her brownies and coffee - she said she had plenty of ice cream in her freezer.  We arrived and made ourselves at home, fixing her brownie with ice cream.

She sat in her favorite spot on the couch and we talked for the better part of an hour.  She, savoring her dessert, talked about life, about death, about Jesus.  Throughout the conversation she processed her way from denial to acceptance.  Always an independent gal, she wanted nothing less than for hospice to come care for her or the home she had always cared for herself in the 17 years or so since her husband passed.

The next day we left for a family vacation.  We returned and within a day or so of our return Laila had gone to be with Jesus.  The kind woman, a nurse, who had cared for Laila in the last months of her life told Isaiah that the last food she ate was the brownie he had brought her.  That last sad, but sweet conversation with Laila is one that neither Isaiah nor I will ever forget.

Had it not been for Wendy's call, we may have missed out on such an opportunity.  It would have been easy to have not gone over having been busy preparing for vacation.  How much we learned by watching one friend accept that the end of life was nearing, and by watching the compassion of another friend.  The compassion of a friend who befriended a dying woman, simply to show her love, concern and care at a time when it was needed... and to be an example to us of what it means to put aside our own discomfort and agenda to care for another in need.

Faithfulness

A continuation of Gratitude ...

Over the years, I have had the great privilege of watching my husband grow in faithfulness.   The faithfulness that Dan continually displayed throughout the storms of the past years is admirable and encouraging.

He allows God to work through him, recognizing that it's not about the work he does so much as it is about being available and prepared to be used by God in whatever way, shape or form the Lord chooses.  His faith has truly been tested, and he has displayed great faith by continuing to follow the path lit before him, even when the step ahead seemed just a faint shadow.

I am honored to be the wife of a faithful, God-fearing man.

One of Dan's favorite devotionals is
Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest.
Please click the link to read an excerpt on faithfulness.   Though succinct and simple, Chamber's words here provide a worthwhile definition of faithfulness, and touch on ways we often distort the meaning of the word, and what is needed to grow in faithfulness.

Forgiveness and Grace

I made a mistake.  My young son, six year old Elijah, asked me to take him to the park to play.  I said, "Yes.  After dinner we will go for a while.  I have things to do just now, and it will be cooler then anyway".

Well, the afternoon passed, me busily trying to accomplish the days tasks.  He played sweetly with his younger brother.  He read for a while, he built grand creations with his pattern blocks.  He didn't beg, nor did he remind of his desire to go run at the park.

Dan was working late and I'd decided to feed the boys mac n' cheese from a box - their favorite- ahead of time and wait to have dinner with Dan after the kids were in bed.  The phone rang and I chatted a bit too long - not something I do often.  They finished their dinner and we cleaned up and I looked at the clock.  Time had passed so quickly and we'd lost track.

I said, "I'm sorry.  We will go tomorrow".  Head hung, shoulders sagging as only Elijah can do - off he went to take his shower and prepare for bed.  I felt badly, knowing I'd failed him, but said nothing.  He returned from the shower with a sweet look on his face.  I knelt down, held his arms and said, "Baby - I'm really sorry.  Will you please forgive me?  I made you a promise and I failed to keep it.  Will you give me another chance to keep my promise tomorrow and be sure you get to play at the park?"

I half expected him to hang his head once again and sulk, but instead his whole face smiled.  He looked me in the eyes and responded, "Yes Mama.  I can forgive you and offer you grace."  I asked him why he would offer grace when I knew I had hurt him by not keeping my promise to him.
He simply and confidently replied,

 "because Jesus gives me grace".